Faith, Family, and Work Without the Mask w/ Rudi Riekstins
For twenty five years Rudi Riekstins believed he was a deeply spiritual man, married with two kids under two, running three companies plus the sales division of a large publicly traded one. At work none of that showed. He pretended he had slept. He pretended he was not a married man with a sick baby at home. He pretended, as he puts it, to be a company man. Ali Jafarian sits down with Rudi, a leadership coach and one of the guest leaders at FRD Live 2026, to talk about what changed when he stopped pretending, and why his own father in law told him he could not do the same thing twice.
What his father in law told him
Before Rudi could even ask to marry his daughter, his future father in law made him wait a weekend, no questions allowed. Then, over breakfast, he leaned in and told him what the role actually required.
“You need to be the example of what it looks like. He then needs to be the pillar of strength and the example of who is he in his faith. And then one day, given the opportunity, he needs to be the example of who he is to his children.”
Rudi spent years trying to keep those pieces separate anyway, the faith in one room and the company man in another, until he says he realized a person cannot be compartmentalized.
When he stopped pretending, the business grew
Rudi’s company had grown three to five percent a year for three decades. When he started bringing his actual beliefs and mindfulness into how he led, growth jumped to twenty five to thirty five percent, enough that the board called asking what he was doing.
“It was acknowledging that you were a husband or a wife, that your problems that you have at home come with you to work because we can feel them, even though you might not be saying them. You’re putting a smile on your face, you’re pretending like everything is okay.”
The same thing showed up on the other side. When someone’s performance dropped, he stopped asking what was wrong with them and started asking what was going on and how he could support them.
“I just need a hug”
Rudi doesn’t only bring this home as a philosophy, he brings it home as a practice. After a day of hard client calls, he came downstairs and told his kids straight out.
“I had a really tough day today, and I actually just need a hug today.”
His eleven year old daughter climbed into his lap, his son told him everyone has days like that, and his wife sent him to go meditate. He came back, in his words, a completely different person.
The move to Montana, voted on by the kids
Rudi’s family recently moved from coastal North Carolina to forty two acres in Montana, away from the subdivision where his kids used to have a dozen other children in walking distance. Instead of deciding for them, the family voted.
“My daughter said, I have never felt more alive. I’ve never felt more at home. I’ve never felt more at peace.”
Rudi’s read on it: kids don’t need everything to stay the same, they need to be let in on what is actually happening and why.
Why this one is better in person
Rudi will be a guest leader at FRD Live 2026, December 2 to 4 in Austin, Texas, and he makes his case for showing up in person rather than watching from home.
“You cannot pretend that everything is okay, because we’ll feel it, we’ll sense it… brothers are going to call you forward, and they’re going to create and hold a safe space for you to heal, to grow, to move forward.”
Find out more about FRD Live 2026.
Listen to the full conversation with Rudi Riekstins on the podcast, where he and Ali get into the wrecked car in the parking lot, the red yellow green check in he runs at work, and why he thinks every hard moment is a gift.
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