She called almost every day, “Jonny, you won’t believe it…!”
She’d tell me about…
- The person she just met.
- The breakthrough she just had.
- Her struggle to breakthrough again.
- The fun she was experiencing.
- …and then, the private jet she was flying home on. What?!
So, Tatyana was away at a Dr. Joe Dispenza conference for the past 8 days.
Morning till night, she gave every ounce of herself to meditating, connecting, and learning to design (they called it manifesting) her ideal life.
Yesterday, she rolled in at 2 am, an inspired woman. Her soul on fire. I liked it.
We all need time away. Time to reflect. Time to think.
I’ve learned the same lesson 100 times.
It’s super important that we, as fathers, husbands and family men get time to grow. It’s equally, if not more important, that we support our #1 ladies in getting their time also.
Occasionally (and regularly) we must retreat to advance.
Day after day, my wife pours into our family. At times, to the point of exhaustion.
She has routines. And those routines serve our family.
Some habits are good, and some are bad.
The habits that serve are awesome, those habits that enslave us aren’t.
Getting away helps create a pattern interrupt. It takes us out of our routine, gives us space to ask “What’s working? What’s not? What do I really want? What must change?”
When we leave home, we get to see it from a new perspective.
Tatyana leaving was a win for everyone. Me. The boys. And certainly for her.
Over the past year, I’ve seen the impact on men’s lives after they attend one of our retreats.
I talk with these men and hear their stories. Next month, we’re having our 6th Front Row Dads retreat. About 30 men get together to talk about…
- Vibrant Health (Physical, Mental, Spiritual)
- Emotional Mastery (Self-control)
- Thriving Relationships (Marriage)
- Intentional Parenting (Education)
- Integrated Living (Calendar)
The only thing better than these men getting time to learn and grow is when their spouse does also (Oh…and you might enjoy knowing that FrontRowMoms.com is being talked about behind the scenes).
Men in our brotherhood have shared stories about their wives getting time away, and the powerful results that follow.
I know of wives who’ve been to…
- Tony Robbins Date with Destiny
- Yoga camp
- Ayurvedic healing
- GoWives adventures
In every case, guys spoke highly about the experience, both for the positive impact it had on their wives, the transformational experience of being a solo-parent during that time, but the overall impact on their family dynamics.
Getting away is about…
- taking inventory
- having real talk
- exploring possibilities
- remembering your core
- making decisions
- creating a shift
While all of us could use a week relaxing on the beach, or whatever you do to totally chill out, this event for Tatyana was about hard work.
She was up at 4 am.
She did 4-hour long meditations.
Mentally, emotionally and spiritually, she gave it her all.
This event demanded her absolute best.
She was preparing for days — even weeks — leading up to it.
I admire her courage. I married a good one! (I hope she’s reading this)
Our FRD retreats are the same way.
We have fun, and we work.
We dig in.
We get honest about where things are, and what we want.
We make bold choices.
We step up.
It’s super important that we, as fathers, husbands and family men get time to grow.
It’s equally, if not more important, that we support our #1 ladies in getting their time also.
I love the good vibes Tatyana has brought back into our home.
She’s lighter, full of love, and beaming with excitement — it’s contagious for us all.
I said to her this morning “Baby…you can go to as many Dr. Joe events as you want. I love seeing you so happy. I love that our boys see you shining so bright.”
She then asked me, “Do you think this feeling will last? Meaning, my excitement.”
- Some of it lasts.
- Some of it doesn’t.
- There’s no question that parts of you have changed — forever.
- You’ll forever see things differently because you’ve seen different things.
- AND…there’s parts of the excitement you feel that will for sure wear off. It should.
Supporting your wife is one of the greatest gifts you’ll ever give to your kids.
Sometimes we forget she’s on your team.
Live events, retreats, experiences are like eating a healthy meal. There’s no question you need good food to nourish you in the moment, and that feeling of being fed lasts for a bit, AND, before long, you’ll be hungry for more.
It’s why we must make personal care, regular care.
It’s why we must tell our kids we love them — regularly.
It’s why we must workout — regularly.
It’s why we must sleep — regularly.
The fact that we must revisit, re-do, remember and have regular rhythms in life… doesn’t mean these things are broken, or that it’s just a quick fix — it’s because life is cyclical.
It ebbs and flows.
It rises and falls.
We breathe in, we breathe out.
- What are you doing to support your wives getting time and space to think, heal, grow, expand, process and flourish —Regularly?
- What’s the next night out she has on the calendar? When is her next weekend away? What about her next week-long retreat that will nourish her soul?
Don’t do this to fix her, do this to serve her.
Comment below, and tell me when her time is scheduled for, and if it’s not, make that your highest family priority this week.
Supporting your wife is one of the greatest gifts you’ll ever give to your kids. Sometimes we forget she’s on your team.
When she thrives, everyone thrives.
Now go be the badass husband you truly are.
ABOUT JON VROMAN
Jon is a husband and father of two amazing boys first, and when he’s not doing that, he’s a social entrepreneur who helps people live life in the front row. His passion is speaking, coaching and running live events.
Jon wrote a book —The Front Row Factor: Transform Your Life With The Art of Moment Making. When people ask him what it’s about, he says –it’s everything you can learn about living life from people fighting for it. In 2005, Jon co-founded Front Row Foundation to help create life-changing experiences for people in need.